By Henry Ominde.
You’d think that those that you hold dear and close to you would notice your worth. That they’d appreciate who you are and regularly affirm just how precious you are and show you nothing less than support. You’d expect that they would help you walk in the right path so that eventually you would become the best you – you in your fullest potential. But then that not always the case.
Sometimes those very same people will crush you. Do everything possible to make you feel that you are nothing and that in order to succeed in this life you need to live under their mercy.
Still can’t relate to this?
Well, let’s then look at the statistics. Numerous studies suggest that lots of perpetuaters are people that are known to the victim. This isn’t just rape and physical violence. Its also psychological torture, exploitation and blackmail.
Truly not everyone that we hold dear to us thinks that we are worth the tender love and care that we actually are. Even when we desperately make a plea for redemption or a cry for help, they mostly turn the other way and label us to be selfish, in need of pity or desperate for attention. Which in my opinion might be valid. ( I know this is a controversial statement. We might explore it on the next post )
In turn, some of us become cold and bitter because we feel betrayed and unloved. Some of us go as far as becoming vengeful while others sink in the bottomless pool of depression and ultimately become addicts or suicidal.
But even then, no one still seems to come through.
At 27 years old, I have lived most of my life expecting people to come through. Desperate that someone would listen to my story, feel my pain and help me appreciate my worth and most of the time what I got was the total opposite. I mean everyone sees what’s happening to you but no one bothers to find out what happened to you to get you to that messy place. No one seems to see the other person’s worth because most of us don’t even realise our own worth.
All of us are blinded by the need to succeed, have material things, get noticed, prove that we are worthy rather than simply notice our worth and appreciate ourselves for what we are worth.
I say, if you only knew what you are worth then you would easily say no. No to anyone that diminished you, no to selfish ambition and greed, no to people that had you live under their mercy, no to circumstances that make you uncomfortable, no to anything and everyone that holds you back. Then gracefully walk away.
I believe that the choice is simply yours to make. You can easily decide to be a victim or a victor.
I recently called myself to a meeting where my body, mind and soul all agreed that I needed to make a change. I needed to let go of everything and everyone that was holding me from noticing my value. I decided to love myself so much that I can now say no to anything and anyone that makes me less than my actual worth.
You see, I know what happened to me. I know what I’ve had to deal with, the battles I’ve fought and continue to fight, the pain and heartache I’ve experienced and what I am capable of.
I know that I am a child of God and nothing about me is flawed.
Hahaha! I know what you are thinking. He thinks he’s perfect, right?
Well, yes. Yes I am. I am a perfect Masterpiece. A work of art that took time to be created. My presence is key on this earth. I am here to pave ways and open doors, to teach from my experiences. My existence is not a mistake. I am here to overcome every obstacle. I am here to say no to whatever tries to alter my creators assignment for me.
You see what happened to you isn’t who you are. You are who you become after that experience. And men, human beings and people have nothing to do with it. They don’t determine who you are, so stop letting them.
Stop expecting people to be what you want them to be. This doesn’tmake you any better. Once you’ve realised who you really are and walk in your splendour and in the glory of your creator – well, then and only then will you realise your life’s worth.
In all the negativity that exists. In all the pain and heartaches you’ve lived. In all the tears and tragedy you’ve experienced. In all the goodbyes and ‘f’ you’s that have been told to you. In all the weight and burdens that you are struggling to lay down. Always remember that you my beloved are enough and nothing should compromise on your life’s worth.
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