By Henry Ominde.
You can connect with him on; Facebook Page: @WholenessEffect, Twitter: @wholenesseffect and Instagram: @h.ominde
THE WHOLENESS EFFECT
A few weeks back I was invited by a friend for dinner. Well I had tonnes of fun and it was actually great for me being around people as I spend most of my weekends alone in the comfort of my home. I got to interact with people, chat , catch up and basically socialize with people that I rarely get to engage with.
Just as I was sipping on what was perhaps one of the best cocktails I had ever had, one of the guests walked up to me and asked me to move. Well this is actually how they approached me. They walked up to me, hit me several times on the shoulder and told me to move to their seat. They told me that that was were I belonged and they wanted to have a conversation with the person that I was seated next to. Well what followed next was a Rosa Parks moment.
‘No!! Ever heard of something called courtesy?”, I asked them. I told them that i would not move until they used the right words. I told them that how he approached me was rude and they ought to know better than to aggressively approach me expecting me to be submissive and simply move. I got that this individual wanted to have a conversation with the person seated next to me and that it was obviously a private one but the way they came on to me was simply rude. To me it felt as though they felt entitled to be bossy given the fact that they were older than me and had a valid reason as to why we should exchange seats.
I totally understood where they were coming from but their approach was simply rude. I told him that the how they approached me was the reason why I wouldn’t move and that if they used a polite more courteous approach I would be pleased to move.
They didn’t listen and went on about how dramatic I was (which I know I can be at times) and squeezed himself in between us. I wasn’t going to move till the other person then asked me politely to excuse them and take next seat which I did. I mean this other person was polite plus I wasn’t about to put myself in the risk of getting COVID-19, social distancing needs to be maintained.
Well, I feel like this other guy felt entitled to have their way. They didn’t consider that I was also a guest just like them and was having a good time just like them and that i too deserve some respect.
I believe that lots of times we feel entitled to certain privileges based on the privileges we may have or in some cases my not have.
Daily we experience and sometimes practice entitlement. In our work places, within our social circles, families and even relationships. We misuse our right to be respected and justify it with our social status, job titles, gender, age, health conditions, feelings, roles, appearances, sex and even sexual orientations.
To me it really doesn’t matter. There’s no reason for any of us to feel entitled to anything. We should never misuse our rights, privileges, health or social status. Everyone is worthy and deserves to be treated with respect.
I believe in doing unto others as I would want them to do for me. Though honestly sometimes my emotions get in the way but still I reflect, own up for the mistake, apologise and try to see to it it doesn’t recur.
A lot of times we make up excuses as to why we act the way we do but I simply look at it as entitlement. We are not entitled to anything. We all need to work for our place and treat each other with the same level of respect that we expect from others.
Just because I have what I have doesn’t mean I should be an ass to those that dont have what I have. Just because I hold certain sets of values doesn’t make it right for me to develop toxic attitudes others. Just because I practice a particular religion or way of life it doesn’t mean that I should feel entitled to anything.
At the end of it all, what we deserve beats what we may think we are entitled to.
#TheWholenessEffect
#Entitlement
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